Gasping For Air

1/14/15 Notes to Myself:Gasping For AirCSmall steps. I'm walking on the heels 
of inspiration and trust. This feels 
like trying to walk on water. I'm not
sure I can float if I fall. I  might
lose everything...

Sometimes that's how I feel in
life and within the process of 
creating.

Not trusting the process I can
work too hard, expect too much
of myself and I begin "gasping for air".  

There's too much going on around me 
it's like a vortex drawing me, splitting
me into fragments. Piece by piece, slipping
into its current,my arms begin to flail
as I try to get my bearings. I can't breathe.

There's a break and I inhale. A
painting is out there... outside the
current. It's peaceful, waiting for me
to return. If only I could relax 
with the knowing I will float to the
surface. There's nothing to fear.

Not far from completion. Nothings lost
I can continue. The end point is 
already there. All I have 
to do is breathe and stop "gasping
for air". 


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