1/14/15 Notes to Myself:Small steps. I'm walking on the heels of inspiration and trust. This feels like trying to walk on water. I'm not sure I can float if I fall. I might lose everything... Sometimes that's how I feel in life and within the process of creating. Not trusting the process I can work too hard, expect too much of myself and I begin "gasping for air". There's too much going on around me it's like a vortex drawing me, splitting me into fragments. Piece by piece, slipping into its current,my arms begin to flail as I try to get my bearings. I can't breathe. There's a break and I inhale. A painting is out there... outside the current. It's peaceful, waiting for me to return. If only I could relax with the knowing I will float to the surface. There's nothing to fear. Not far from completion. Nothings lost I can continue. The end point is already there. All I have to do is breathe and stop "gasping for air".