1/06/15 Notes to Myself: As thoughts creep into my mind regarding all the things I need to do with the advent of a new year I feel myself becoming "splintered". Although I know I am moving toward light and doing my best to "live" in each day and moment. Today, I seem to be letting the future cast a cloudy web inside my head. Creativity seems to disappear and I get scared. You see as artist its important for me to keep active in my studio or outdoors painting. This is what nourishes my spirit and keeps me grounded. So why don't I just go and paint? I realize I'm sitting in a GAP of internal struggle. My heart knows where it needs to be but I avoid letting myself go there. Procrastination has crept beneath my skin. I become fragmented instead of focused. Frustration mounts and I divest myself of the very thing that will rejuvenate my soul. Taking time to observe this experience, I stop to write a few lines. Breaking the cycle, walking through the GAP I pick up my brush and paint!